Dino Spadaccini
Key Veteran
Location: USA
| > You have two choices in life: You can stay single and be miserable, or get
> married and wish you were dead.
>
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> At the cocktail party, one woman said to another, "Aren't you wearing your
> wedding ring on the wrong finger?" The other women replied, "Yes I am, I
> married the wrong man."
>
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> A lady inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Husband wanted". Next day she
> received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have
> mine.
>
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> When a woman steals your husband, there is no better revenge than to let
> her keep him.
>
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>
> Eighty percent of married men cheat in the USA The rest cheat in
> Canada.
>
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> A woman is incomplete until she is married. Then she is finished.
>
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> A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get
> married?" And the father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."
>
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> Young son: Is it true Dad, that in some parts of Africa a man doesn't know
> his wife until he marries her?
> Dad: That happens in every country, son.
>
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> Then there was a woman who said, "I never knew what real happiness was
> until I got married; and by then it was too late."
>
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> Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
>
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> If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every word
> you say, talk in your sleep.
>
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> Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life thinking
> they had no faults at all.
>
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> You know the honeymoon is pretty much over when you start to go out with
> the boys on Wednesday nights, and so does she.
>
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> Husband: Want a quickie? Wife: As opposed to what?
>
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> First guy: "My wife's an angel!" Second guy: "You're lucky, mine's still
> alive."
>
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> Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with
> a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are attractive to the
> opposite sex
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