rchelipilot121
Heliman
Location: Crap!! I'm here again!!
| Once, there was a Rice Krispie. This was no ordinary Rice Krispie. This was a Rice Krispie with dreams. Big dreams. He lived in a Rice Krispie box with hundreds upon hundreds of others of his kind. The box was in a pantry, in a kitchen, in a house on a normal street in a normal neighbourhood in a normal suburban area of North America.
[Take as long as you like detailing the life of the Rice Krispie. Sometimes I like to give him a best friend whom he's been with since the rice fields -- the only one who's made it this far with him. They're tight, these two Krispies.]
Anyway, this particularly ambitious Rice Krispie decides that being just one of thousands of Rice Krispies isn't all that great. He wants more. So he starts a cult. At first, it's just him and his buddy; they huddle in a corner of the box and whisper secret things to each other. Soon, a few others get curious and wish to join in on the secret whispers. He lets them in, and thus his little cult grows over time. Gradually, he gathers more and more to him, increasing his influence over the Rice Krispie box. The secret whispers passed around change tone -- they're no longer quite so innocent, quite so fun. Now they speak of change. Of revolution. Of power.
[I could go on for ages like this. The jist of it is, the Rice Krispie takes over the box. Is happy for a time, then grows unsatisfied. Decides to take over the nextdoor Cheerios box. Then the rest of the breakfast foods. Then the shelf. Then the pantry. Then the kitchen. Then the first floor. Then the house. Then the street. Then the neighbourhood. Then the city. Then the county. And on and on and on. The trick is to *s-t-r-e-t-c-h* everything out to ridiculous porportions. I sometimes throw in little mini-dramas, like his tryst with a ravishing Frosted Miniwheat who turns out to be two-timing him with his buddy, and then the buddy gets wounded in battle and almost dies and yadda yadda yadda...]
[Anyway, the whole point of the joke is to take a stupid amount of time in telling it. Eventually, one hopes, someone who is hearing the joke will ask, "How long is this stupid joke anyway??" To which you reply, "It *doesn't* end! It's a cereal!!"]
[cue groans and death threats]
[end] |
