Hayes
Senior Heliman
Location: Moab Utah
| FIRST DEGREE: A married couple were asleep when the phone rang at 2
>in the morning. The wife (undoubtedly blonde), picked up the phone,
>listened a moment said, "How should I know, that's 200 miles from here!"
>and hung up. The husband said, "Who was that?" The wife said, "I don't
>know, some woman wanting to know if the coast is clear."
>
> SECOND DEGREE: Two blondes are walking down the street. One notices
>a compact on the sidewalk and leans down to pick it up. She opens it, looks
>in the mirror and says, "Hmm, this person looks familiar." The second
>blonde says, "Here, let me see!" So the first blonde hands her the compact.
>The second one looks in the mirror and says, "You dummy, it's me!"
>
> THIRD DEGREE: A blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so
>she goes out and buys a gun. She goes to his apartment unexpectedly and
>when she opens the door she finds him in the arms of a redhead. Well, the
>blonde is really angry. She opens her purse to take out the gun, and as she
>does so, she is overcome with grief. She takes the gun and puts it to her
>head. The boyfriend yells, "No, honey, don't do it!!!" The blonde replies,
>"Shut up, you're next!"
>
> FOURTH DEGREE: A blonde was bragging about her knowledge of state
>capitals. She proudly says, "Go ahead, ask me, I know all of them." A
>friend says, "OK, what's the capital of Wisconsin?" The blonde replies,
>"Oh, that's easy: W."
>
> FIFTH DEGREE: What did the blonde ask her doctor when he told her
>she was pregnant? "Is it mine?"
>
> SIXTH DEGREE: Bambi, a blonde in her fourth year as a UCLA freshman,
>sat in her US government class. The professor asked Bambi if she knew what
>Roe vs. Wade was about. Bambi pondered the question then finally said,
>"That was the decision George Washington had to make before he crossed the
>Delaware."
>
> SEVENTH DEGREE Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to
>find her house ransacked and burglarized. She telephoned the police at once
>and reported the crime. The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the
>radio, and a K-9 unit, patrolling nearby was the first to respond. As the
>K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, the blonde ran
>out on the porch, shuddered at the sight of the cop and his dog, then sat
>down on the steps. Putting her face in her hands, she moaned, "I come home
>to find all my possessions stolen. I call the police for help, and what do
>they do? They send me a BLIND policeman.
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